Tuesday 26 May 2009

One less member in the house

The signs of me entering the veteran phase of my life is becoming clearer by the day. On Saturday, we sent our second son for registration at UiTM in Shah Alam. He is doing Kursus Asasi Sains and if he does well, hopes to continue to study Medicine.

Another of our offspring has flown the roost, so to speak. Our household has one less member, and since we are not a big family to begin with, the relative quietness of the house is becoming more pronounced.

Registration day at UiTM Shah Alam for Asasi Sains students


Two brothers having fun before one is left behind to stay at the hostel

We have only three children, all boys. The eldest flew away to study at an overseas university. With the second one now in college, it leaves only the youngest son at home. My third boy is 14-years old... so I guess we have another three years at least, for us to bermanja-manja with our anak bongsu. After that, it will be just the missus and me... two elderly folks growing old together. Hopefully, we would not be getting on each other's nerves too often.

When I was dating my wife many, many years ago, this issue of how many children we would like to have was discussed once... but it was more of in jest. She asked me how many kids I wanted. Hmm... let's see, I said. My parents have five children and you have thirteen siblings... so why not we meet half way, say nine kids. She let out a loud laugh.... hahaha! No way, she said.

Over the years, I would meet with old friends or long-lost relatives whose questions would include the standard `Anak dah berapa sekarang?'. My response would always be : `Anak baru tiga' instead of the expected `Anak dah tiga', the former implying that we have three kids for now but hope for more to come. If my wife is around when the question is being asked, she would correct the answer to the latter.

This wish of having more children has crossed my mind a number of times, especially since we have no daughters. It concerns me that my wife would not have a daughter to help take care of her in old age. Having seen the ailments that my late mother-in-law suffered, I know that there are certain things only a daughter can do.

But I have never been the one to pressure my wife on this subject. The choice of stopping at three was entirely hers. When I mentioned about who is to take care of her when she's old, she simply replied, `Let's hope that we get very good and kind-hearted daughter-in-laws.'

At times like these, the common adage of `It's the quality and not the quantity that counts' becomes a appropriate, even though it is just a small measure of self-comfort. In Malay we say, `Sekadar untuk menyedapkan hati.'

We have three healthy, intelligent and well-behaved sons. We know some friends and relatives who have only one child... and some friends and relatives who have none. We should count our blessings.

18 comments:

mamasita said...

Salam Oldstock.
Yes..yang penting kita bersyukur.Your 3 fantastic boys will definitely be married to nice well-mannered girls who in turn will provide you with dutiful and loving daughter-in-laws.
Yang dalam gambar ni handsome2 and happy-looking young chaps! Alhamdullillah..

DrSam said...

Congratulation to your son for having the first step into achieving his dream.

I am like you, having all boys offspring but the total number is four. I always grateful to what God gives us, even though a daughter would have cheered us (my wife) more.

Chahya said...

May you have a good besan in the future...

Be grateful even though you all dont' have girls...coz some others don't have boys...

Those who dont have what others have surely would be greatly thankful & appreciate when they finally receive..., tak begitu Mr. Oldstock?

Kama At-Tarawis said...

Salam Pak

Lawa2 orang muda you. Hensem macam ayahnya gak! (Psstt.. Ibu, jangan marah ekk, heheh).

All boys pun takpa. Syukur. Insyaallah Tuhan akan bagi menantu perempuan yang baik, yang pandai mengambil hati mertua.

To the young man: uphold the good name of my alma mater, tau.. zaman auntie kat sana, masih lagi ITM, lom ada 'U'...

Oimira said...

ehh im ex asasi too. kt UM. but tak jadi dokter lah. jadi mcm skrg ini hehe

Unknown said...

soon, U'll be experiencing the 'empty nest syndrome'!

then, U'll be checking in to retirement village...

hehehe....

Fadhil said...

Salam mamasita,

Tu la... harap-harap dapat menantu yg baik-baik belaka. As you know, not many menantu perempuan can get along well with their mak mertua, but we shall always hope for the best.

Fadhil said...

Wow Doc, 4 boys huh? Must have been a handful to raise them.

Seems like we are in the same boat, no daugthers of our own. So kita tunggu je la anak bujang kita dapat jodoh nanti.

Fadhil said...

Chahya,

Sungguh benar kata-kata mu itu.

Not to worry, I am contented with what I have. If I'm serious of having daughters, I would try my best to do it by some other way, like say, setting up another branch... heheheh. Oops, jgn marah ya. Gurau je.

Fadhil said...

Salam Ibu Kama,

Mudah-mudahan kami mendapat sebagaimana yang Ibu doakan itu. Makasih :-)

Fadhil said...

Moira,

Pasni kamu gi amik PhD pulak... dapat jadi doktor.

Fadhil said...

Verse,

No such thing as retirement. Once all the kids have left the nest, me and the missus would travel the world. Life is an adventure!

Jarod said...

YUP Uncle, count your blessings for you have 3 kids. :)

I am the only child in the family. Some time, it is really bored cause I don't have any one in the house hold to chit chat..

Hmm.. bout having daughter, may be you can ask your wife to try again? :) for the last time ?

Fadhil said...

Jarod,

No more trying. That's it. :-)

hanitha said...

salam bro...
post ini membawa kenangan manis 28 thn yg lalu semasa memuler register di uitm shah alam....
perindu tu semmgnyer asrama lelaki sejak azali ehehhee... i kat kenanga 4..
hai...seronoknyer dpt belajar semuler ek..n fall in love again ahaks

Fadhil said...

Salam Hanitha,

Kenangan lama memang indah bila kita ingat balik sekali sekala.

Yang part falling in love again tu bahaya... dah masuk alam vetran ni, cukuplah setakat yg ada, heheheh.

Anonymous said...

menantu yang baik2 belaka?? wah...ni mcm green light je abah....

hehe...:D

~your son at jordan~

Fadhil said...

Along,

Confirm green light... tapi complete study dulu :-)

P/s - check out my Facebook at fadhil.isma for more pics of Fathhullah's wedding.